‘ello kiddies. Welcome to another installment of “Shameless Cheap Promotion For Me And My Friends.” Did you miss me last week? Did you even notice the column was missing last week? Well, no matter. I’m all hopped up on cough medicine and ready to deliver another kick-ass installment of this exercise in self-serving journalism.
Recently—February 10, 2003, to be exact—The Tudor Lounge was home to a “Special Show for Sweethearts.” The bill consisted of three of the most romantic bands residing in WNY: My Penis, Anal Pudding, and The Next Syphillis. Okay, so it wasn’t your typical, sappy rock n’ roll evening, but it was one of the most exciting shows to descend upon the Queen City in quite some time.
Starting the evening off was the Rochester-based punk band My Penis (www.mypenisrocks.com). These guys obviously listen to punk bands that existed long before kids like Good Charlotte—who, for unbeknownst reasons, believe they’re punk—were even born. Hey, remember how The Dead Kennedys sang songs like “Holiday in Cambodia” and “Kill the Poor” to shock and offend people while simultaneously making them think about and question society? That’s where My Penis is coming from, with songs of ancestral guilt and going to Afghanistan. Then again, they have a song about masturbating to pictures of your mom, so maybe they’re just sick fucks. Either way, “Just Like Bukowski” is the feel good song of the year (all two months of it): “Lost my money at the dog track / Just like Bukowski / Bought a cheap whore and want my money back / Just like Bukowski / My cheeks are pocked and my jaw is slack / Just like Bukowski.”
My Penis is a hard act to follow, but amazingly enough, Anal Pudding managed to steal the show that night. Already being dubbed Buffalo’s Next Big Thing, I cannot find the words to accurately describe the experience. Really all you need to know is that they had a toilet with crazy lights in the bowl and a smoke machine on the tank lid. Not enough to get you interested? Well, the bandmembers consist of a cowboy on drums, a goth on keyboards, a mad scientist on bass, a black Viking on guitar, and… well, I guess the only way to describe the singer is pimped out court jester. The music is a sort of rap/funk/post-punk concoction. Their song “Tripping On My Turds” reminds me of Captain Sensible’s “Wot.” That’s a compliment, I think.
The Next Syphillis rocked the joint, but of course, you knew they would so I won’t waste your time telling you so.
If you haven’t had your fill of someone gratuitously plugging their crappy own band, please visit the “Band/Artist Promotion” forum on the wnymusic.com message board. It’s a hoot.