JE-SUS WALKS.

Wow, the football team actually knows how to win a game. GO BULLS.

To da fatas bitch at da front at ma class. Was realy realy good ho?

smoke a blut!!1

ITALIA!

Notes found in a Lockwood Study Carrell:

- Well if you ask me out, I will breakup with my boyfriend 4 you. Cause I like you too and he isnt treating me how I want, but I know that you will.

- I knew from when I first saw your beautiful eyes, lips, and hips that you was the girl that would make me want to be in love. Will you dump that other brother and be forever my lover? I think I can do a little better than just forever your lover. I will be any and everything you will ever need...so yep.

-YESSSSSS! I think we should have our first kiss now. I think we should keep our relationship a secret.

Do u like me? Circle yes/no. How embarrassing.

To the Fitch Bitch I love so dearly, stop wearing the same hobo outfit to the bar every night. You’re not cute, even with beer goggles.

To my roommate the turd-burgler: Please flush the toilet. Thank You.

To the freshman girl I got head from on Thursday Night: YOU SUCKED.

One of the first rules we learned in kindergarten was that there is no talking in the library.Get hip, you fools.

Dear Scum of Earth: It was nice knowing you.

Ladies 18-21: WANTED for study on alcohol and sexuality. Meet at 315 Student Union weeknights after midnight. BYOB biotch.

To the girl with the “I <3 LA” bag. I think you are lost, and if you keep walking that slow, you’ll never get found.

UB Bookstore: Thanks for the poster. Just a little ingenuity and an x-acto knife makes buying seem just plain inefficient.

Those cheesey bean burritos from Putnam’s are giving me the shits, but I can’t stop eating them!

ECUADOR!!1

Hey Norma Jean: Botch wants their riffs back. Love, Chase.

To the girl from Broadway Joe’s: Make your next stop Planned Parenthood...For your STDs I mean. Because you have them.

To L.I. girls. Sorry about last year, you’re really not so bad. In fact I’ve found that there’s really no correlation between one’s hometown and one’s intelligence. We’d like to make it up to you with a pizza party. Let us know-Westerners.

ALL L.I. GIRLS SUCK MEGAHUGE COCK FREQUENTLY.

That sounds like a way of remembering the planets. Minus pluto.

SAVE PLUTO! AND MICKEY!

UB football still sux.

To whoever keeps pooping on the floor in my bathroom, i don’t get it. house meeting, maybe?

that’s a lot of pizza

I’m interested in the tibetan chanters SA.

If I can get that pizza.

To the band outside the Student Union: you’re pretty ok.

Donny, shut the fuck up. You’re out of your element.

Federal agent, drop your weapons.

WANTED: HOTT MAN for HOTT ASSISTANT ADVERTISING MANAGER.

For the best in anal sex, try Crisco! Smooth to the last thrust!

Snakes on a mother fucking plane!

Serpents aboard a mother fucking airliner!

To all dorm residents: The next time I see you parking on the spine I will slash your tires. And your face.

Dear Weather: WHAT THE FUCK?!?

My hips don’t lie

To AKPsi: FU. From PSE

Creepy guy in my World Civ class, please stop staring at the TA’s boobs. They may be huge, but you are creeping everyone out. Love, the whole class.

Al pinche sucio de mi roommate, deja de jugar dados con tu verga cuando estoy durmiendo. Pendejo.

Dear Spectrum- Littering is a crime. Stop publishing pull out ads.

Littering and...Littering and...

SMOKE A BLUT!!1