So, I walked into the campus Starbucks on Saturday morning, needing to get some caffeine to get me through a long Saturday of production. Being a Dunkin’ Donuts man myself, I had no idea what I was doing there. What the hell is a “venti,” for example. I’m an American, and last time I checked the dictionary, there was no “venti” entry, but there sure as hell was a “large.”
But I digress. The point I was trying to get at here was that I ordered a “Frappuccino,” figuring that it had to be like the Cappuccino that I normally get at DD. But much to my dismayed surprise, the cup I was given was filled with ice and whipped cream, not piping hot coffee.
This brings me to the overall moral of this story, which is that some people (namely me) have no idea what they’re doing when it comes to cooking or drink-making. And as such, I’ve decided to disperse the following delicious recipes, concocted and regularly consumed by yours-truly. Note they’re placed in convenient dotted-line boxes, for easy cut-out and retention on your fridge or in your recipe book, for a lifetime of flavorful enjoyment.
The Moss
INGREDIENTS:
1 shot of Tequila
1.5 shots of Gin
Ginger Ale
3-5 cubes of ice
PREPARATION:
In a 12 oz. cup (preferably Plastic Party variety) mix liquors over ice. Fill cup with Ginger Ale. Stir once with finger and serve.
The Mosswich
INGREDIENTS:
8 GIANT Goldfish crackers
12-15 pieces of pepperoni
2 slices of American cheese
2 slices of bread
(I recommend Potato)
~1oz. of hot sauce
Some butter
PREPARATION:
Start by placing one slice of cheese on one slice of bread. Layer the pepperoni over the top. Splash on the hot sauce, and then arrange the Goldfish to fit your bread. Top with remaining slice of cheese and bread. Lightly butter the outside, and grill on a pan to desired level of burned-ness. Careful when flipping, as contents are prone to fall out.
Prep Time: ~7 mins.
Drunk Prep Time: ~15
The McMosswich
INGREDIENTS:
2 eggs
4-8 strips of bacon
(precooked or fresh)
2 Eggo waffles
Some Maple syrup
Some butter or cooking oil
PREPARATION:
Begin by preparing your bacon, if necessary, by frying it in a pan. Following this, prepare another frying pan to cook eggs in. While pan heats up, place waffles in toaster. Fry eggs, breaking the yolks and adding salt and pepper to taste. Flip after about two minutes, and let finish for about one more minute. Remove waffles and place eggs and bacon on one. Add a splash of syrup, top with other waffle, and enjoy
Prep Time: ~10 mins.
(double if cooking real bacon)
Moss “Stew”
INGREDIENTS:
1 can of SpaghettiOs
A bunch of Goldfish crackers
Some parmesean cheese
Some hot sauce
A pinch of garlic powder
PREPARATION:
Open the SpaghettiOs and pour into a microwave safe bowl. Nuke for two to three minutes, until hot. Remove from microwave and add Goldfish, parmesean, hot sauce, and garlic to taste. Mix and serve.
Prep Time: ~5 minutes
