To dog-faced girl in ME: Your voice makes me want to pour Drain-O in my ears and your face makes me want to brand my eyes. Stop living in the computer labs! Please fall on a knife.

To the bitch who peed in my eyes while I was drunk on dyngus day. FUCK YOU! I went blind.

Graduating Jew looking for a Cum Dumpster Bitch that loves Convo and dead rappers. Find me on the 3rd floor of the union--PS I smoke headies

Graduating alcoholic looking for girl to throw it in who loves shutting up and keeping quiet. 3rd floor SU. PS--I like getting head.

WHEN YOU WIPE, DO YOU STAND OR LEAN? THINK ABOUT IT.

Room 482, overflowing with whore juice since 2006.

Dear girl who Queefed in World Civ, you're a disgusting dirty human being, and don't ever sit next to me again, you foul foul creature.

to the bitch bitch little bitch on goodyear 9.... lets get luv drunk and make bad decisions together... from the kid down the hall

Thank God!!! Finally there is an email system worth using...!!

To all the band wagon Sabres fans, you know who you are. You're the people wearing a Sabres hat and jersey (new logo) and it isn't even game day, you ask when half-time is going to start, you boo your team's starting goalie, and you probably started liking the Yankees in '96 when it was popular to do so, but most of all you're douche bags don't turn the Sabres into the Yankees, they suck

Last issues personals sucked balls....infact I got more entertainment from tea bagging...step it up bitches

And with personals such as this, how could they not be enthralling?

Rich jew with extra Sabres third row playoff ticket. Looking for attractive female Sabres fan. Must put out before and after game.

ive adored you from afar... can we smoke a blut?

You too person in Schuss office.

heroin is the best diet ever!

Level 24 Harry Potter LARP enthusiast seeking Hermione Granger LARPer Level 18 or higher. Roll d20 in front of SU for compatability.

Dear “Hot Freshman Boy English Majors,” talk to us when you get published, or at least get recognition outside your stoned twentysomething English 102 profs. We only put out to Pultizer prospects. Sincerely, the couch surfer and the not-so protester.

Fuck dolphins!! You will be missed.

To the ARTF girl who works on weds and thurs, you’re gonna need a safety walk when I get through with you!

To the cock-juggling thundercunt in goodyear. Get the sand out of your vagina and put a fat cock in your mouth because no body wants to hear what you have to say. LOVE GOD

Hey vegeta what does that scouter say about the numbr of people who smokea blut!!!!!11! "It's over nine thousand!!!111!"

dear generation, WHAT DOES IT TAKE FOR U TO ACCEPT MY PERSONAL U STUPID SLIMEY DICKS!

Perhaps flattery?

To the fine folks who hang out in the communter lounge, generally the left hand corner with the table... For the love of God and sake of all us heathens, please do not speak of you sexual experiences aloud, they're nasty, and so are you. The rest of us assholes need this place to pass the fuck out inbetween our classes, so please spare us the nightmares!

Ninjas are cooler than pirates

ARRRGGGHHHH!! YOU BE WRONG, MATEY!!!

To all UB students who lose such things as UB cards, licenses, credit cards, etc...come pick them up you morons. We contact you for a reason. Stop being so lazy and take care of your shit. Signed-The annoyed chick who works in the Lost and Found

To my roommate... she is faking it for the 30 seconds you are inside of her

Fuck smoking a blunt, smoke some crack, that crack spider was a true pimp

taking applications from anyone willing to carry my Grandpa's oxygen tank to His*** .. no payment for your services - but ur mere amusement of the situation should be reward enough