SOME LIKE IT HOT
Bikram Yoga College of India
656 Elmwood Ave.
8/10
by Francisco Baiocchi
The ancient Hindu philosophy of yoga teaches that only through intense focus and meditation will one achieve ultimate self-knowledge and liberation. The modern teachings of Bikram Yoga take that pearl of wisdom and drop it into a smoldering furnace. From their sweltering studio in the heart of Buffalo’s Elmwood district, the instructors of Bikram Yoga College of India work to cultivate an intense journey of body and mind for their students. And if you’re just a first-time yoga student like me, you’ll at least attain the self-knowledge of what a weak, uncoordinated mess you’ve let your body become.
Named for its charismatic creator, yogi Bikram Choudhury, this form of yoga is popularly known as “Hot Yoga.” Consisting of 26 traditional yoga poses, called asanas, and two breathing exercises, Bikram Yoga is ideally practiced in a room heated to 105-degrees Fahrenheit and kept at about 50 percent humidity. According to the official Bikram website, these Amazonian conditions are intended to detoxify the body, increase the heart rate, and to allow for “deeper stretching” of muscle tissues.
And make no mistake—these classes are hard. The 90-minute class is definitely a challenge for the yoga novice, but the instructors and students at Bikram Yoga College create a welcoming, supportive atmosphere for newcomers. “You’re not going to set any records your first time,” said seasoned instructor Roberto Valenza, “but if you take it slowly you can enjoy the benefits of yoga even after the first class.” The stretching poses can be somewhat strenuous, with names such as “Head to Knee” and “Awkward Pose” (I’m not joking). At times, the heat will definitely have your heart racing. In these moments of strain Valenza reminds his students to breathe. “If you’re struggling,” said Valenza, “that means you’re not breathing.”
By the end of class the I felt completely drained, like a well-moistened senior citizen—I worried that by tomorrow I’d owe my body an apology. To my surprise, I awoke the next morning feeling refreshed and energized, if just a bit sore.
Classes are offered at several times daily at the Bikram Yoga College, and present only a minor hazard to your wallet at $11 per class, including mat rental. If that price seems steep, one Bikram student had a recommendation: “Just buy less beer and cigarettes and you should have plenty of room in your budget for a weekly yoga session.” Besides, these guys obviously have heating bills to pay.
“Yoga is the art of listening to the body and quieting the mind,” said Valenza. “Your fears…[and] your habitual thoughts will hold you back from really getting the benefits of yoga, so its important to keep an open mind.” Though perhaps not for the sweat-fearing, Bikram Yoga will give you a new appreciation for your body, and could be the start of a healthier, more nimble you.
TOP FIVE MOST EXCITING THINGS TO DO IN BUFFALO AFTER DARK
by Guy M. Scrivo
Let’s be honest with ourselves; Buffalo is not the most metropolitan city in the world. But did you expect it to be? You came to Buffalo to get away from your overbearing family, not to live like Paris Hilton. You’re going to have to entertain yourself somehow, so let a native like myself enlighten you to some local culture and stimulation.
5. Put chemicals into your brain and body Sometimes drinking is a precursor to socialization—oftentimes, it’s the entire event. In the dark ages, people had to drink beer instead of water because the water was diseased. In Buffalo, people drink beer nonstop because the night life is diseased. Better yet, serious drug dealers are pretty blatant in most neighborhoods here. Some offer you crack while you wait for the bus.
4. Go to the dog fights About five years ago, Buffalo was number one in the nation for arrests involving illegal pit bull fighting, and not coincidentally, number one in documented pit bull attacks. But who doesn’t enjoy watching starved and abused animals kill each other? Plus, it’s pretty fun to hustle that racist Junkyard Eddie, who suffered from some brain damage in the ‘80s and always bets against the black dogs. Also the best place to meet singles when the Walden Superflea is closed.
3. Dump your garbage off on the East Side It costs money to bring it to the dump, so suburbanites often trek over to the East Side of Buffalo in the middle of the night to drop their old couches off on a corner and drive away. No one getting paid by the city will ever clean it up, and neither will community residents. Think of it as a time capsule that lowers the property value of surrounding residences. If you’re lucky, it might even catch fire and make the evening news.
2. Unprotected Sex Buffalo has more teen pregnancy than the Bronx, statistically, so if your girlfriend bores you with her slightly used vagina, head over to Riverside and you can raw dog it with an anonymous 17-year-old runaway you meet in the park at 3 a.m. One year, Buffalo was number two in the nation for documented cases of syphilis, beaten only by San Francisco (the universal capital of butt sex). Syphilis, as we all know, is an archaic STD known for driving people insane before it kills them, which explains a lot about the Queen City.
1. Screaming at people from cars A few years ago, some friends and I invested in a high-powered emergency spotlight and a RadioShack megaphone, and drove around on weekends in University Heights looking for women wearing tube tops in winter. We would shine the light on them and yell, “This is the Ho Police. Get down on the ground right now! You are in violation of your own body and self respect!” While nothing was gained from this experience, we did humiliate a bunch of drunks while thriving on it like shame vampires. Isn’t it pathetic that this is the number one item on the list?
Everything closes in Buffalo at 10 p.m., especially if you’re too young to drink. So if you don’t have a car, I guess you can sit in your dorm and download shit off of the UB DC++ hub. In retrospect, that is what you will miss most about Buffalo once you’re gone. Trust me.
Tara’s Favorite Restaurants
by Tara-Jeanne Sullivan
I enjoy dining in restaurants too much for my wallet to handle. Regardless, here are some of my favorite places to wine and dine:
1. Shango-3260 Main St $$$
Shango Bistro is a blessing to the binge drinking atmosphere that is synonymous with University Heights. Its cuisine draws from the spices and tastes found in Cajun cooking with menu items like blackened catfish po-boy ($8) and Creole bouillabaisse ($15.95). The sleek interior boasts a fully-stocked wine bar that also carries unique beers from microbreweries across the country and beyond. There are tantalizing specials on a nightly basis, and Shango offers one of the best brunches in Buffalo. Mimosas and chorizo omelets beat out Denny’s by a landslide. On April 25, the restaurant will be offering an extra- spicy five-course tasting for $25. See if you can take the heat.
2. Fuji Grill-724 Maple Rd. $
Sick of the crap they try to pass off as sushi on campus? Check out the real deal at Fuji Grill. Nestled in a strip mall housing a Blockbuster and M-and-T Bank, Fuji Grill provides a surprisingly exotic ambiance. During lunch time, this place has one of the best deals in town. Lunch boxes (choices include teriyaki tuna, sesame chicken, and tempura, among others) come complete with sides of salad, soup, and California rolls. All are between six and eight bucks. Everything they serve is presented beautifully and taste as good as it looks. They even take the time to carve carrot garnishes into koi fish.
3. Brodo-4548 Main St, Amherst/Snyder and 765 Elmwood Ave. $$
Okay, I’ll confess: I am madly in love with soup. Brodo, although offering three to four daily soup specials, is much more than its name implies. Aside from the great soup, my favorite is Dominic’s brodo ($5 a bowl), a rich mix of spicy sausage, tomatoes, and Swiss chard. The restaurant’s menu includes hearty paninis, one with braised beef, artichokes, provolone, and horseradish-red pepper mayo on whole wheat bread ($7); another, sharp New York State cheddar cheese, granny smith apple, and peppered slab bacon on oat grain bread ($6). They also call themselves a wine bar, so their selection rivals some of the areas most upscale eateries. Soup never looked so good.
4. Off the Wall-534 Elmwood Ave. $$$
For a restaurant to call itself “an oversized living room–with an unexpected, unpredictable aesthetic flair,” it must be doing something worth checking out—Off the Wall definitely is. Their food is as eclectic as the atmosphere; retro and kitschy in all the right places. With offerings like Buffalo Eggplant Wings ($6 for a single order), Designer Mac and Cheese “TV Dinner” ($17, served with two sides and dessert), and banana bread French toast at breakfast time ($7), you’d think your mom was doing to the cooking—if she were a hipster.
5. Falafel Bar-1009 Elmwood Ave. $
If you’re not familiar with the Middle Eastern dish of mashed and fried chickpeas, get to know it a little better at Falafel Bar. The tiny eatery is lush with Mediterranean colors, providing a relaxed atmosphere. The menu is rather large, with offerings ranging from falafel wraps with various toppings such as tabouli, tahini or pickled vegetables ($5-6), to beef and lamb kebobs ($7.99 and $8.50, respectively), lamb hummus ($6.50), and many other Greek and Middle Eastern specialties. The only thing that would make this better is if they turned it into a hookah joint.
TOP FIVE CHEESES
by Frankenstein
1. MUENSTER!
2. MUENSTER!
3. MUENSTER!
4. MUENSTER!
5. SWISS!
BRUT ART FOR THE MOD SQUAD
Art Brut - Mod Club, Toronto
7/10
by Andrew Blake
The first time I heard Art Brut is something I will always remember. It was a lot like the first time I watched American Gladiators. I wasn’t really sure if I was supposed to laugh or take it seriously, but by the time Turbo was throwing tackles on the final stretch of the Gauntlet, I knew it didn’t really matter what the intention of American Gladiators was. I was already drawn in, and the force keeping me there was something of immense proportions.
It’s about thirteen years later, and I get the debut CD by British alternative punk band Art Brut, Bang Bang Rock and Roll. The music itself on the disc was nothing I hadn’t heard before, but the energy and spirit of the singing was something that I could not walk away from. Songs like “Formed a Band” and “My Little Brother” were full of awkward, self-defining lyrics delivered with nervous, pompous British accents that you could not help but listen to over and over. That was two years ago, and seeing them in Toronto last week proved that their music is not some throwaway novelty, but honest rock and roll that has yet to bore me.
Seeing Art Brut live is like watching a kid’s dream of growing up to be Mick Jagger come true. In the case of Art Brut, singer Eddie Argos draws his inspiration from eccentric punk icon Jonathan Richman. Argos often interrupts his own songs—he even interrupts his own segues. Getting his story correctly told to the crowd seems to be the most important thing he can offer. He explains his lyrics, even the most literal, and when the song does not call for a vocal melody he is prone to picking up the mic cable and entertaining the crowd with makeshift jump-roping. Perhaps this would not be as entertaining if Eddie was not an out-of-shape yet well-dressed (new single “Nag Nag Nag Nag” declares “Wet trousers in the washing machine / I’d rather be damp than seen in jeans”) goofy British guy.
The show at the Mod Club included at least three references to Morrissey, one trek through the audience to lead an extended chant of “Modern rock makes me want to rock out!” from the song of the same name, and around half a dozen tunes from the new album, It’s A Bit Complicated, due out next month.
Unfortunately, one thing the show lacked was a drunk and rowdy audience, sans myself, something that had been a staple of the last few Art Brut shows I attended. Most of the crowd was nerdy, Canadian girls who seemed unlearned in the school of rocking out. The abbreviated set, only one hour, and absolutely horrendous sound made the show nowhere near as enjoyable as I would have expected, but the energy of the band made up for it. Props to the fat Nazi bitch who wouldn’t let me bring in my camera. I hope you get SARS.
An aesthetically pleasing den
The Den - CFA
10/10
by Elina Vaysbeyn
As I walked into the basement gallery of the CFA this past Thursday, I thought the displays on the walls were part of a professional modern ad design exhibit. As I got to talk to the talented designers milling around the gallery, I realized they were soon-to-be graduating University at Buffalo students. The Den is a project for Kyle D. Schlesinger’s Art 422 Design Issues class. The aim was to create hand-made DIY (do it yourself) items bearing each artist’s own unique style, breaking away from the stereotypically sleek idea of design.
The gallery was transformed into a boutique filled with one-of-a-kinds. Each set of individual items rested on a little white cabinet. The first arrangement of items, by Rachel Gottorff, simulated an ‘80s style, and was labeled, “I Brake For Yard Sales.” It featured a sweater that your grandma might wear while taking a stroll in Fort Lauderdale (sweet) and a classic garage sale Paradise mug. It had the feel of the summer days of our childhoods. After that, I stumbled upon Allison Ernst’s bright and cheery ‘50s-themed DIY collection with a spotted ceramic piggy bank, a mug, and coasters, almost all complemented with bright blue, yellow, and green polka dots. Honestly, I would hire some of these people to decorate my house.
Following this trip down memory lane, I encountered a project titled “Sole Design,” Jason Jitzchaki’s label. Its inspiration seemed to be an inner city basketball court featuring two kinds of bright-colored sneakers and T-shirts with an iron-on of a city skyline silhouette.
Brian Archibald’s choice of display was as amusing as it was flawless. It was white and clean, and had the soft colors of a Spanish villa. Containing a cracked, yellow note pad, Kraft caramels, a vase, and plates among other items, the display was an expression of his design prowess. Also, Archibald presented a pair of boxer briefs branded with the ingenious slogan, “Who designed your package?” Jennifer Loring’s piece, that she says was inspired by influences both “elegant and professional,” dazzled me as well. She hand-sewed two fashionable purses, as well as the pages of a little watercolor notebook in her display, following a simplistic, but extremely delicate and pretty flower pattern imprinted on all her items.
Amongst other favorites were Christopher Charles’s “Linlew Design,” featuring brain in a fishbowl imagery, Fern Toh’s fern-imprinted assortment, and Kate Barnum’s MTA bus map inspired collection (it hit close to home).
I fell in love with a few student displays at The Den. They were all highly professional, and I wish all these diligent artists luck in their post-graduate endeavors.
