“I have to be serious once in a while.” Jeffree Star, 22, delivered his agenda through a wavering lilt over the phone to the Generation office a few hours before the androgynous, self-proclaimed “Jesus Christ with fake eyelashes” performed at Buffalo’s Mohawk Place last week. “So many people look up to Jesus…I think I’m the next generation. There is no one really out there right now that kids can really look up to.”
There is a pause. There has to be more to this.
“I did go back in time and suck off Jesus, but he had a small dick, and I didn’t want to talk about it.”
Oh, there we go.
Star achieved international fame by dominating networking sites on the internet half a decade ago through establishing an eye-catching web-presence on Myspace.com, among other sites. As a make-up artist in California, Star (real name Jeffrey Steininger) established a rapport with west coast actors and musicians while still in his teens, and thanks to his brow-raising appearance and attitude, accentuated with over-the-line mascara, electrifying hair-dos, and the tendency to over-use the word “cunt,” he has managed to still remain in the public eye today. Ready to move onto another art form, music, Star is on tour right now supporting his soon to be released album Cupcakes Taste Like Violence, his second full length and first available in retail stores.
“I was doing make up for so many celebrities and so many bands, I thought, ‘Why am I behind the scenes?’” said Star, in regards to his transition into the music industry. “I should be on the stage, because I was better than everyone.” Combining the mechanical grind of Marilyn Manson and Rammstein with the sexual deviancies of electroclash diva Peaches and the ego of a mid-80s Madonna, Star’s music, recorded, is not exactly below par. Any audio engineer will tell you that that’s not a hard feat to accomplish with the studio know-how and necessary machinery, though. On stage, Star belts, off key, feebly attempting to stay even close to the intended range. At Mohawk, by the third track, Star abandoned his singing voice in lieu of lisped obscenities, inadequate growls, and erotic poses. By the fourth number, I was sitting at the bar. He’s got to be doing something right.
“I made some songs for fun, put them on Myspace, and I never imagined that my low-fi tracks would get so big,” said Star. “Now its time for me to take it the next level.” Unfortunately, he falls quite short of reaching anything beyond mediocre, and live, it’s horrendous at best. Over the phone, Star confesses that his recording career is his main focus right now, though he does have a reality TV show in the works. “It’s going to be kind of a crazy Surreal Life of the next generation of teen icons. It’s going to be really crazy.”
Icon, role model, and “queen of the internet” are all titles Star uses to describe himself; the comparison to the founder of Christianity was just the tip of the iceberg. “It’s what I’m all about,” remarks Star, on the subject of his role as a positive influence among his teenage fans. “I feel like so many people are…scared of being themselves; I just want to tell people that it’s okay.” An efficacious affirmation, for sure. When Star preaches atop rerecorded drum beats and recycled synth lines to a room of a few dozen fans, most far below the age of consent, it’s hard to see how much stake he puts into his position.
“Sliddin’ down the pole / Swallow it whole / Flood control / Always on patrol / Let’s take a stroll / Into your hole / On cruise control / Now pay the toll / I want... / Pants dropping, slow fucking, floor mopping… / Right now.”
His Myspace page sums up his intentions better than his failed rhyme scheme can: “My music is just another reminder to shut the fuck up and take your clothes off.” Few at Mohawk Place were out of high school.
“I just want to be, like, pro-expression,” says Star. “I don’t want to be a Dr. Phil. I feel like so many people are insecure and scared of being themselves. I just want to tell people to understand that it’s okay. Who gives a shit?”
Star’s press release reads like a drunken four a.m. blog post: “He has become a role model for the new post 9/11 America. And Post 9/11 America is where we are at. Haters beware, there’s more to Jeffree Star than makeup and well coiffed hair, more than the space age Teflon personality from which he deflects bullets and bombs faster than super heroes in the movies.” Over the phone, Star is quick on the draw and surprisingly sharp, yet when it comes down to tact, talent, and tolerability, he falls drastically short. And as far as being a role model goes, Star barely edges out Mussolini; though witty, and no matter how you look at it, edgy, the value of his word falls somewhere between Paris Hilton and Hitler. Online, Star claims that “even JonBenet Ramsey wanted to be me.” Star was ten years old when the Colorado beauty pageant model, only four years his younger, was slain. Behind the mascara, heels, and Pro Tools, there is not much about Star that adds up to, well, anything.
One hundred kids crowded the stage at Mohawk, and Star claims to have played to ten thousand more at some events. Once the recycled beats and make-up is eliminated, Star appears to be a puzzle, wrapped in an enigma, wrapped in a retard.
By the time this issue comes out, you will finally be hearing that cliché that this week’s election is the most important one of your lifetime for the last time. Before you go to the polls, don’t forget to take to heart Star’s endorsement for the 08 election.
Generation: Who exactly will you be voting for on election day?
Jeffree Star: I’m not. I’ll be too busy with Louie Vuitton.
Generation: Well, if you were voting, who is looking good to you right now?
Star: I don’t know how to vote. I only know how to fuck, suck, and lick taint.
Pray for America.
