Oh, hello,

It’s 8:05 on Friday night, and before the case of Red Bull Cola drives me to (delicious, delicious) convulsions, I’m maniacally typing away on my laptop a quick send-off to the faithful readers of Generation. Usually we reserve this sort of bullshit for the preceding editorial page, but we already laid that out an hour ago and frankly, I’m sitting here looking at a blank page. Let’s face it: I can’t send this off to the printers like that, now can I?

For those that missed the memo, this issue marks the final installment of Generation for the fall semester. Also, as per tradition, this week’s chapter is also our annual Fall Fiction issue, showcasing the best from our bang-up gang of writers that make up our Literary section, and even a few special guests. Keeping with the trend of literary excellence, and thanks to the (seriously) hundreds of submissions I’ve received this week, the personals (you know, the next thing you’ll turn to, if you haven’t made it there already) are composed entirely of haikus. Why? Because I’m mad with power, demanded it like a baby, and a bunch (read: way too many) of you followed through. Thanks, guys. You made my job really fun this week. If you see any of the literary writers on campus, buy them ice cream and tell them “Good job,” even if you don’t mean it; they’re fragile. I have a good feeling you’ll like what you read, though.

So, before we stumble out of the office red-eyed from a caffeine overload and exhausted from ten consecutive hours of proof-reading, unable to drop our trusty red pens from our perma-grip clutch, I reminded myself that I need to say a few things. You see, guys, we are halfway through the year. Crazy, huh? We got a nice chunk of hate mail this semester, a few rave editorials in The Spectrum (thanks, guys!), a few mentions in Visions (ditto!), a handful of vulgar voicemails from our advertisers, a few questionable threats, and all this from just these ten issues. Nice! Whether it was good or bad, we did…something. And something is better than nothing, no?

You won’t see us until next year. We’ll be back the second week of the spring semester, and we plan on throwing 12 solid issues your way before the summer hits. Use these few months to think about and reflect upon how much you love us, and when we come back, I expect to see a bunch of you clawing at our door for a job here. I already snuck an ad somewhere in this rag, but if you are looking for a few extra English credits next semester, there is no finer place to pick them up them from a slot on the Generation staff. To the all the haters, thanks for the good times thus far, and I hope to hear your cheery voicemails on my answering machine when I come back from winter break.

Love always,

Andrew Blake

P.S. Santa, if you are reading this, I would like a Smoothie maker and some books for Christmas. Non-fiction.