Come Christmastime, I never draft anything up for Mr. Claus because the only things that I seem to want these days are either intangible or…Japanese. This might seem strange, but who wouldn’t want a stocking full of “Kawaii” trinkets? You could trim a tree with Pocky boxes, alone.
On December 8, Darren Murph of Engadget.com posted what looked like it might be the ultimate, adorable, Japanese gadget. That’s the first time that I laid eyes on Thanko’s USB “Kumasan” bear gloves and, you know what they looked like to me? Toasty, embroidered perfection. When Murph noted, “There’s no mention of a price nor any indication that these will ever be released outside of Japan,” these hi-tech USB-buddies frowned at me from my laptop screen. If plush bears had brows, they would have forlornly furrowed them. We looked at each other. The reflection of my eyes met Kumasan bear’s as they were mirrored onto the screen over his own. I felt a tingle in my tummynot in my tummy really, but a little ways up and to the left where that great big ball of striated muscle is nestled. Images of our eyes swirled together before me in a pixilated pool of inky darkness.
Unable to read Japanese characters, and being a couple Yen short, I searched the internet for International shipping to no avail. We had no choice but to accept the unbearable distance that separated us from each other.
In the coming weeks, I gushed to some friends about these seemingly-unattainable bundles of joy. Around Christmas, a friend presented me with my very own pair of Thanko handwarmers. Hey, maybe I’m too quick to assume that no one’s listening when I talk about the internet and fluffy mammal accessories, but I was pleasantly and genuinely surprised. He found them on Meritline.com for $11, shipped.
I plugged them in immediately. Both hand-warming units are powered by one USB plug. Silver cords attach the power source to the plush gloves, which are detachable. The cords are long enough to allow for a wide range of movement, yet also happen to be long enough to tangle your arms, laptop power cord, phone charger, little brother, etc. in a web of charming, yet inconvenient, constriction. The gloves are fingerless to prevent the inhibition of typing ability. Faux fur wristlets fasten with Velcro closures. A textured, no-slip cushion separates the inside of the wrist from the typing surface for optimum comfort.
After remaining plugged in for over an hour, these suckers get pretty hot—almost too hot, even. While the majority of wearers are probably small Japanese women with incredibly low BMIs and substandard body temperatures, no one needs to expose their hands to this much heat. After a while it just gets uncomfortable, but the first thirty minutes or so are still just so pleasantly toasty that I can’t say no to a little cozy hand-hibernation.
For now, I’m happy. Maybe next holiday season I’ll be prepared to drop hints and hope for Thanko’s harp seal-shaped optical mouse. Arf.
For eleven bucks total, these are well worth it. Dinner in the Commons will cost you eleven dollars and you’ll end up walking back across campus with a tummy ache and frozen fingertips. They make a great gift, and they seem to be reasonably well-constructed. If they keep me comfy for half the winter, they’ll be worth my while.
