The Underworld series, now on its third film, has always held an unusual place among genre films. Is it horror? If so, it’s not particularly scary. Is it action? If so, it has an awful lot of dedication to complicated backstory. Is it romance? If so, it’s got an awful lot of… well, vampires and werewolves. However, the newest film in the series, Underworld: Rise of the Lycans attempts to project a new genre onto the franchise: period piece.

Taking us back to the Dark Ages, Rise of the Lycans deals, as the title suggests, deals with the origins of the werewolf/vampire war that’s defined the Underworld franchise. Lucian (Michael Sheen) is a werewolf born into slavery to Victor (Bill Nighy), the cruel leader of a large vampire clan. Lucian is in love with Victor’s daughter Sonja (Rhona Mitra), but when he finds himself imprisoned for a questionable crime, Lucian realizes that he needs to lead the werewolves against their bloodthirsty masters in the hope of earning their freedom. In short, Rise of the Lycans is the book of Exodus, had Moses been a werewolf and the Pharaoh, a vampire.

The Underworld series has always had tonal issues, and the newest installment is no different. Part of the problem lies with the characters themselves. The werewolves tend to be either mindless animals or noble heroes, with no middle ground. The vampires, on the other hand, simply aren’t vampiric. We rarely see them drink blood, or exhibit any sort of power other than strength. To their credit, their reaction to the sun is less “sparkle” and more “disintegrate,” but the film still tends to feel more like “werewolves vs. obnoxious upper-class snobs.”

This isn’t helped by the franchise’s dogged insistence upon taking itself seriously. Most of the movie is shot in a blue filter so strong that only the fake blood has any color, and the dialogue lacks even the faintest hint of humor. Nor do the actors bring any genuine personality to their roles. The performances of Sheen (Frost/Nixon) and Nighy (Pirates of the Caribbean) lack any of the individuality that one would expect from actors of their caliber. Even the action scenes seem dull; gone are the earlier films’ epic shoot outs, replaced with poorly choreographed swordfights.

That’s not to say that Underworld: Rise of the Lycans is an entirely terrible movie. In fact, terrible is perhaps an unfair way to describe the film at all. It is utterly mediocre. The action is sub-par, the dialogue and the acting are colorless, the film stock, and the themes of equality and freedom are treated with all the subtlety and elegance of a five-car pileup.

If you enjoyed the previous two movies and you’re curious to see things happen exactly as they’ve already been described (twice), you have a craving for lame dialogue and even worse CGI and don’t get the Sci-Fi Channel, then by all means check out this movie. If you just totally love vampires but thought that Twilight didn’t have quite enough blood, then this is the film for you.

Otherwise, you can probably do a whole lot better at Blockbuster.

Underworld: Rise of the Lycans is inoffensive and inessential. It’s frankly a waste of time unless you really loved the first two.