P E R S O N A L S
Dear Blond Bitch in PSY 2** Statistics....Shut your trap before I take my shoe off and go Iraqi on your ass and do it myself. History aint so awesome now is it?
hey dude with the hot lips that works at wrap it up. I want your dick in or around my ass <3
If this dude started the term twat waffle, then ghandi, tupac and gary coleman are doing jaeger bombs in my closet right now
Hey Im the 16 year old chick in Cooke... aaaand I have some leftover chicken wings you can suck outta my braces.
to the dumb wandering drunk hoe I call my friend, i did not enjoy seeing you having sex on the dance floor through the window of Mojos. love, penis in her nose. bitch.
BUDDHA!!! Canopeners will never find him.
Hey people who lived in governors last year, remember the guy who used to scream you suck from the car? Well yea Im back YOU ALL FUCKING SUCK!
FUCKING BRUCE WILLIS JUST HEROICALLY NUKED HIMSELF TO SAVE THE WORLD...FUCK THATS AWESOME
The tar pits are boiling...I think theres a volcano in LA...FUUCCCKKK...o wait Tommy Lee Jones is here...BLOW UP A BUILDING! TOMMY LEE JONES YOUR FUCKING NUTS!...O shit it worked...how’s that kid supposed to find his family “they all look the same”
Dear Hubies, If you ever get rid of the 3$ Slider combo, i’ll shit in your hat
dear mae*** professor, please stop being a jerk. thanks.
Dear Generation, All I want is to see the word “cuntishness” in print. Thank you
i wanna roll you into a little ball and shove you up my vagina, you could just live there its warm its cosy, i wanna walk around with you in there and just know that if i ever feel a little tickle or scratch its just your hair!!! on my vagina
so i usually don’t read generation cause i’m not literate enough to comprehend anything beyond, “to the girl with the nice rack, may i jizz btwn your tts?” but today i decided to flip a couple of pages backwards and i came upon an m. ward article AND a beirut article. now, like i said, i am fairly illiterate so i didn’t get past the titles, BUT: generations staff member(s) with good taste in music — plz jizz on and around and between my tts okay?
M. Ward? Yes. Jizz? Well. I’m a girl, but I can manage.
CAN U WHISTLE AND SUCK DICK AT THE SAME TIME?
to CVS customers: why do we have to tell every single one of you that your credit card goes into the machine “strip up and to the left???” there’s even a picture. goddamn.
To that Kid in my His*** Class...the right time to go psycho and flip out is NOT during a HITLER propaganda film. fail.
Dear sexy baseball boy I want to hit a home run with you while you are wearing nothing but your hot moccasins.
Do you like being fake fucked on my corduroy couch!? YEAH?!?!
I hope all of that friction makes the pleasant *whoosh* *whoosh* *whoosh* of corduroy-on-corduroy.
and while you were giving me head.... no more quesadilla’s
To the boy with the QUARK skillz and the navy slippers: DO ME
i am? I am. I AM.
Does anyone want to help me bring the charlie chaplin mustache back?
what is oral spelt backwards? idk but its not as good as a blow job
My official apology to UB males for giving you all boners then peacing out. SRRYYMYBAD
Wanted: Dirty hippy freshman boy for a dirty hippy junior girl on the prowl.
Every year, there’s a day called St. Patty’s; / I get shitfaced and fuck lots of fatties. / I, more often than not, / Find the easiest twat / In the back of LI daddies’ Caddies.
can someone make their pledges run around in banana and gorilla costumes in the union already?
To the kid who pretended he was Mexican in World Civ... you’re a tool.
Big Gulps, huh? Walp, see ya later!
Dear Sprite Girl,
A. I don’t know how you made it this far in the program.
B. Just because you put your sprite into a Dasani bottle, does not make it calorie free.
C. Please stop singing and dancing in every single fucking, God Damned class that you’re in... you suck at it and you look like a poodle trying to motorboat my Grandma.
Thank you, ES class
To my TA that looks like pikachu, ill show u mine if u show me ures
I’ll bet $5 and 12 brown M & M’s, that Carmen Sandiago and Osama are in it together. Can you say, Hide and Seek CHAMPIONS?!?
in reference to last weeks issue... does anyone ACTUALLY know what the difference btwn Jam and Jelly is?
Jam contains pieces of fruit. Jelly does not.
Join the LGBTQABCDEFG!
Dear Bert’s, please move your goddamn menu out of the middle of the fucking hall so we can walk. Sincerely, everyone
to the girl in my ELP *** class who always reads Generation before class starts on wednesdays.... turn to your right, chances are, i’m staring at your boobs.
To that girl i fucked in capen on 2/24. Ure pussy smells like vagina
Girl who always plays tetris during Psych....you suck at tetris
you give me pins and needles
Dear UB, It’d be awesome if you test drove with your bus drivers before hiring them. I’d definitely prefer not spraining my wrist or bruising my palms in an effort to survive the driver running over the curb, twice, on the way to south. Sincerely, UB Student who will now be driving
to my roommate. the other day when you thought you drooled on your pillow it wasnt really drool and you slept on my cum for 3 days before you noticed
to generation: thanks for not submitting my comments u fuck tard, u guyz must hate obama to note submit my comments, fucking kkk lovers
Dear Campus Cash users, You cant use it to tip. You never have been able to use it to tip. You probably never will be able to use it to tip. Learn to bring some fucking cash! Thank you,University Heights businesses
Just the tip!
SPRING BREAK WOOOOOOO!
Alright, alright. Vacation time, kids! See you in a few weeks. If you see Carson Daly in Cancun, make sure you kick him in the balls for us and call him a lady. Good luck on mid-terms and we’ll see you soon. Ta!\
