It’s five o’clock, work is out, and it’s time to pick up the kids from daycare. Upon arriving, you find a mother breastfeeding her four-year-old child in the middle of the classroom, and all the children are standing around watching. You may feel a bit perplexed and frustrated because now you have to explain this situation to your child, and frankly, do you even know why you should? What kind of mother would be so inappropriate as to do this to her four-year-old? What the heck?

Some people might think that this is not normal and should be stopped immediately, which is why some might be surprised to know abnormality may not be the case. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that a new mother breastfeeds for a minimum of one year, and both the American Academy of Family Physicians and the World Health Organization recommends that she breastfeeds for a minimum of two years.

“The experts say that after the minimum has been met, mother and baby should continue to breastfeed for as long as they both want,” Dr. Kathy Dettwyler, an anthropologist and leading professional on breastfeeding, comments. “My anthropological research on a natural age of weaning suggests two and a half years as a minimum for humans as a species, with around seven years as a maximum.”

Some mothers choose to breastfeed their children longer because of the many advantages that it offers them. Mary Alice, a Ph.D. student in the department of biophysics and physiology neuroscience program at UB, and a La Leche League leader for the Amherst group, is currently breastfeeding her 20-month-old fraternal twins, and mostly continues for the health reasons. “I didn’t want to force weaning on them until they were ready to do it themselves,” Alice says. She feels that her children “are much more socially adjusted and confident than many other toddlers in their group at daycare,” because they were breastfed longer. According to their website, the mission of the La Leche League is that it “strives to help mothers worldwide to breastfeed through mother-to-mother support, encouragement, information, and education, and to promote a better understanding of breastfeeding as an important element in the healthy development of the baby and mother.”

Alice has had her twins in daycare since the age of three and a half months old and she goes to daycare during the day to nurse them. “This has greatly benefited our relationship because breastfeeding has always been a sense of comfort and security for them.” She also says that, not only are her children less sick than the others in daycare, but “they are not as obese as their formula fed counterparts,” too.

Amy Gates, a stay at home mom and blogger, breastfed her daughter until she was four and a quarter years old, and is currently still going strong with her son at two years and four months. Gates also chose to do this for health reasons, effecting both her children and herself, and, as she plainly states, “because it’s what breasts are for.” She also does not want people to get confused about how much a mother nurses their older children. “When I say I nursed my daughter until she was four and a quarter, she was only nursing once per day, [and] I think this is often the case with many older nurslings.”

Dr. Dettwyler is a mother of three, and the longest that she ever breastfed one of her children was for five and a half years. She thinks that “the wider cultural context of life in the U.S. does not make breastfeeding easy for mothers.” She believes that the U.S. does not offer adequate maternity leave, and many mother’s employers simply don’t offer on-site childcare services. Dr. Dettwyler knows mothers who have experienced difficulty due to social stigma associated with extended breastfeeding. “Many women are made to feel uncomfortable nursing in public,”she said, adding that companies should become more child-friendly so that a mother can bring her children to work and breastfeed them if she chooses to do so. Even those mothers who pump their milk at work must do so “facing the crude/rude comments of their ignorant and unsupportive coworkers,” Dr. Dettwyler adds.

Many who choose to breastfeed their children for longer than a year receive unwanted negative comments from outsiders. Alice says that “it’s because those people are ignorant to the benefits of breastfeeding children beyond a year, [and also because] they, themselves, were not nursed at all or that long.” Dr. Dettwyler knows mothers who have breastfed their children for longer than one year and experienced people “[threatening] to report [them] to child protective services for having sex with [their] child.” She also states that soon to be ex-husbands might possibly try to use this accusation of perversion against mothers in court cases. According to Dr. Dettwyler, some ex-husbands claim that their former spouses “are getting sexual enjoyment out of the nursing and that’s why you won’t have sex with him anymore.”

There are also many psychological advantages to extending the breastfeeding period. According to Dr. Dettwyler, the child will be much happier, healthier, smarter, calmer, and nicer. She further claims that it also offers a sense of pride. “Michael Jordan was breastfed until he was three years of age and is proud of it.” Lastly, Dr. Dettwyler finds that it prolongs “the wonderful, affectionate relationship you have with your child that passes too quickly.”

Some of these advantages will also extend to the mother physically. It reduces the risk for breast and ovarian cancer and osteoporosis. Another advantage is that the mother’s “bloodstream is suffused with those… mothering hormones, especially oxytocin,” which makes the mother more caring, receptive, and interactive toward the baby. According to www.oxytocin.org, “the hormone…[has] shown [it is] associated with the ability to maintain healthy interpersonal relationships and healthy psychological boundaries with other people.”

So, are those parents who choose to switch their kids over to formula really helping them? According to Dr. Melissa Stoppler, a U.S. board certified anatomic pathologist, “the disadvantages of formulas are primarily their expense, the lack of maternal infection-fighting antibodies that are in breast milk, and the fact that no formula can exactly duplicate the ideal composition of breast milk.” The American Pregnancy Association (APA) claims breast milk is “easily digested and absorbed,” whereas it is difficult for some babies to digest the artificial composition of formula. The APA also says that the only real advantage to formula is that the mother does not have to feed the baby. Anyone can do it if formula is used. Breastfeeding for an extended time prevents the father from offering the same bonding experience as the mother because he is unable to feed the child.

Breastfeeding may also be a harmful disadvantage because of substances that are blood-bourne and can pass on to the child. According to Elizabeth Schafer, a professor in food science and human nutrition, and Nicholas Fradgley, an extension associate in food science and human nutrition, these substances include “medications, alcohol, caffeine, pesticides and lead.” Rebecca Williams, a writer for the U.S. Food and Drug Administration, says there are certain viruses and illnesses that can also pass on to a child through breast milk. According to Williams, “Women who are HIV positive should not breast-feed [as well as those who have a few other illnesses] such as herpes, hepatitis, and beta streptococcus infections.”

Alice comments that her doctor is supportive of the way that she chose to raise her kids, but she also states, “I think he thinks I’m a little eccentric and crazy for letting them nurse that long.” When her doctor asked about weaning them she told him, “I thought I would let them wean themselves.”

Dr. Robyn Steinacher, a board-certified pediatrician at Lifetime Health Medical Group’s West Seneca Health Center, says that the children should “not emotionally [be] dependant on their mother’s breast for comfort [and that] they should be able to separate from their mothers at this age and not remain dependant on them for nutrition.” She feels that children should be able to comfort themselves at a certain age, as this is a necessary step in emotional development. “This does teach the child inappropriate coping skills,” says Steinacher.

Kathleen Kendall-Tackett, Ph.D. at the family Research Laboratory at the University of New Hampshire, and Muriel Sugarman, M.D. at the Augusta Mental Health Institute in Augusta, Maine, did a study on the social consequences of long-term breastfeeding. The study research participants in the study consisted of 179 members of the La Leche League. What was found in the survey was that most mothers said that it had a “social stigma” with a negative approach as the children got older. According to Kendall-Tackett and Sugarman, “29 percent cited social stigma for breastfeeding past six months, 44 percent for breastfeeding past 12 months, and 61 percent for breastfeeding past 24 months.” According to the women that completed the survey, relatives and strangers were the two most frequent sources of negative treatment due to breastfeeding.

Lauren Palleschi, a nursing major at UB, thinks “it’s weird” that mothers breastfeed their children past the age of two. When asked what she would think if she is to ever witness it she said, “I’d think it was gross and that they need to not let their kid do that anymore.” Lawrence Albano, an anthropology graduate student at UB, has a different opinion on the matter and says, “It really is not all that uncommon in other societies.” Albano also said, “With the economy the way it is, it’s a good way to save money.” If he were to ever see a mother breastfeeding their older child his “first reaction would obviously be strange…but it isn’t my breast or my kid so it isn’t any of my business.”