In every personal music collection, there exists at least one or two albums that you’re not exactly proud of—maybe the band’s not cool anymore or maybe the album just sucks. Whatever the reason, the sad truth is that at one time, buying such an embarrassing item made perfect sense. The following is a list of what we at Generation feel are the albums that contemporary college students are most ashamed of owning. For those of you not ashamed of owning one of the following albums, good for you! Maybe we can go to a Sisqo concert sometime. Oh yeah, if you’re wondering where Vanilla Ice and Milli Vanilli are, well we just felt they were a little too obvious.
Please Hammer, Don't Hurt 'Em (1990)
A veritable "must-have" for suburban white kids
In the early '90's.
Artist: MC Hammer
Song you bought it for: "U Can't Touch This"
Excuse: I got it free with the purchase of a pair of
SKIDZ.
Forever Your Girl (1989)
The blue-print for every cheerleader-loving, poppy
piece o' crap for the last 12 years.
Artist: Paula Abdul
Song you bought it for: "Forever Your Girl"
Excuse: Shit, uh, my sister must've left this here.
Tub Thumper (1997)
The best commie/anarchist drink-along LP since
The Leon Trotsky Experience.
Artist: Chumbawamba
Song you bought it for: "Tub Thumping"
Excuse: Dude, what do you mean? I get drunk,
they sing about gettin' drunk…what don't you get?
Hangin' Tough (1988)
'Nuff said.
Artist: New Kids on the Block
Song you bought it for: Take your pick, loser.
Excuse: I only bought it because their first album was
so street.
What's the Story Morning Glory (1995)
The worst Beatles album since RINGO.
Artist: Oasis
Song you bought it for: "Wonder Wall"
Excuse: MTV told me to buy it.
Skyscraper (1988)
Roth's attempt at life after Eddie.
Artist: Diamond David Lee Roth
Song you bought it for: "Just Like Paradise"
Excuse: I shoplifted the wrong tape.
Get on Up and Dance (1996)
An essential album for anyone who likes booty bass.
(That's pronounced BASE)
Artist: Quad City DJs
Song you bought it for: "C'mon Ride It (The Train)"
Excuse: They wouldn't let us enter Myrtle Beach without it.
The Sign 1993)
Who says you need to know English to go gold in the US?
Artist: Ace of Base
Song you bought it for: "The Sign"
Excuse: Bro, they were big in Europe!
Shaq-Fu: Da Return (1994)
The logical next step for an NBA allstar (that was sarcasm).
Artist: Shaquille O'Neal
Song you bought it for: "Shaq Fu"
Excuse: Patrick Ewing gave it a good review.
Totally Krossed Out (1992)
Cute little, pre-pubescent boys getting down on some
serious gangsta shit.
Artist: Kris Kross
Song you bought it for: "Jump"
Excuse: They performed at my barmitsva.
Sunshine on Leith (1987)
Two young Scottish lads with the drive to annoy the most
tolerant of us.
Artist: The Proclaimers
Song you bought it for: "I’m Gonna Be (500 miles)
Excuse: ‘Benny and June’ fucking rules!
The Bodyguard: Original soundtrack Album (1992)
The second highest-selling soundtrack of all time—
Kenny G never sounded so sterile.
Artist: Alan Sylvestri, Whitney Houston, Various Artists
Song you bought it for: "I Will Always Love You"
Excuse: Dude, shut up…that was our song.
12 Inches of Snow (1993)
"Informer, you know say daddy me Snow me I go blame, a
licky boom boom down"—fucking genius.
Artist: Snow
Song you bought it for: "Informer"
Excuse: It came from Canada. How was I supposed to know
it sucks?
Up (1992)
If you own this, you should be ashamed of yourself.
Artist: Right Said Fred
Song you bought it for: "I’m Too Sexy"
Excuse: There is no excuse.
Home (1995)
Another example of when Catholic School kids get a hold
of instruments.
Artist: Deep Blue Something
Song you bought it for: "Breakfast at Tiffany’s"
Excuse: It was a gift. No seriously, it was.
CMB (1991)
Laying the groundwork for all the boy bands we’ve come
to know and love.
Artist: Color Me Badd
Song you bought it for: "I Wann Sex You Up"
Excuse: C,mon, they were Donna’s favorite group on 90210.
America’s Least Wanted (1992)
Another example of a bad metal band trying to jump on the
grunge bandwagon.
Artist: Ugly Kid Joe
Song you bought it for: "Everything About You"
Excuse: I heard it in the weight room during wrestling practice so
many times that I just had to have it.
Wilson Phillips (1990)
A musical menagerie for neglected housewives everywhere.
Artist: Wilson Phillips
Song you bought it for: "Hold On"
Excuse: I got it with the Winger album for two bucks.
Mack Daddy (re-released 1998)
A first in a series of albums dedicated to fly booty.
Artist: Sir Mixalot
Song you bought it for: "Baby Got Back"
Excuse: Me, well, I prefer the butt—so it all made sense.
Gonna Make You Sweat (1990)
Proving that guys with ponytails can make it in the world of hip hop.
Artist: C&C Music Factory
Song you bought it for: "Things That Make You Go Hmmmm…"
Excuse: Satan told me to buy it.
Honorable Mention
Four Non Blondes
Skeelo
Salt n' Peppa
Def Lepard
Bon Jovi
Sisqo
Eddie Murphy
