So, I wrote an edit note a couple weeks ago in which I said a number of very

enlightened and witty things. One of the very last things I happened to mention was that I was, "ever so amused" by the fact that departing Clinton staffers removed the "w" keys from the west wing keyboards. Well, Spectrum Editorial Editor, Michael Lucinski decided in his 2/7/01 Op-Ed entitled "Defending the New Guy" to personally attack my opinion that this "vandalism" was amusing.

Mikey gives a laundry list of all the things he claims to have been vandalized in the White House, including, "obscene graffiti" and, "stolen china" and then asks, " Would Mr. Davis find it 'amusing' if the Generation offices were vandalized in a similar manner?"

To me that sound like a bit of a threat, you guys got something up your sleeve we should know about? But, to answer your question Mikey, I gotta say I probably would find it amusing. I don't know if you've been in our offices lately, but they ain't nothing to write home about, and some good old fashion vandalism might be just what the place needs. He also goes on to assert that the United States government is not "Animal House" and were going to have to pay for the clean up. Well after the $40 million we spent on not indicting Clinton, I really don't mind the couple thousand it might cost wash off the walls and pull open the filling cabinets. And, on a personal note, I would love to see John Belushi issuing executive orders for more coke, or starting food fights in the White House mess.

I don't know why Mikey decided to drone on about what I had to say, if he had read the rest of it he should have realized that it was a humor piece. On second thought, I kind of hope Mikey's piece was humor as well. In it he says, "I guess we learned a valuable lesson--always keep the nice things away from the white trash." Could you get any more ignorant Mikey? Let me get this straight, your saying that because someone comes from a lower socioeconomic class, you deem them white trash and they shouldn't be president? He also compares the entire Kennedy family to cockroaches. Now, I know that the Kennedys aren't the great American Dynasty that some people make them out to be, but John and Bobby fought for civil rights--what the fuck have you done for the common good lately Mikey. To be fair in my edit note I did call G.W. "Elmer Fudd" and a "pinhead", but I also called Clinton a "pervert" and explained that I would be saying the same stuff if Gore had been elected, so at least I have the decency to be a equal opportunity asshole.

Now, I know we here at Generation, and the folks over there at The Spectrum have had our differences in the past, and I really don't want to start a big argument here, but if your gonna take what I say out of context, I'm going to be forced to respond. You probably shouldn't take anything I say all to seriously though Mikey. After all I'm just a silly bleeding heart liberal who voted for the guy that got the most votes and likes those less fortunate than me. But, like you said, we shouldn't let the poor people near the good stuff right? Every president should be a half-wit, who was lucky enough to be born into the right family and has had a number of failed business. Because, hey, they have class right?

Also, in last weeks issue our esteemed Literary Editor, Mr. Al Cerda, took the time and consideration to write a well thought out and researched piece on why he felt the staff of the Prodigal Son are a "bunch of dorks." In it, he gave solid evidence as to why a recent article in the P-Sun has little to no basis in reality, and the best response they could come up with was "Hey Generation morons... got spellcheck?"

You know what assholes, we do have spellcheck, It's just set to Spanish and we can't seem to get it back to Ingles. Do you think you could come over and help us out with it?