Like anyone with one eyeball trained on the popular music scene, I was completely blown away when Steely Dan walked off with the most controversially coveted accolade of the night. But hey, I reasoned, the album got nominated; it can't reek, right? Wrong. Perhaps it is impossible for me to listen to Two Against Nature without comparing it to the other nominees, which included Eminem's catchy as hell and utterly deplorable Marshall Mathers LP, Radiohead's subtly symphonic Kid A, Paul Simon's laid-back You're the One and Beck's tongue-in-cheek hip-hop trip Midnight Vultures. If I had chanced upon a copy of Steely Dan's abysmally mediocre rumination on all things elderly prior to the Grammy fiasco, I might not have found it as painful as I do now. Asked to consider it the best of the year, however...oh, how it makes one shudder. The album is monotonous and uninspired, proving conclusively that "adult contemporary" is a dirty word. I am simply stunned that the album was even nominated; you'd think that Paul Simon's name on the ballot would have given the more conservative voters someone to check off (and a Simon win, truthfully, would have been a-ok with me). Maybe I'm just a young, ignorant whippersnapper who wouldn't appreciate good fusion dinosaur jazz if it bit her in the ass. Either way, I'll take my generation's angry bottle blondes, caterwauling Brits and geek-chic AV weirdos any day of the week, thank you very much.