The scientific community was stunned this past week when Generation's very own Literary Editor, Mr. Al Cerda, became so excited that he literally creamed his shorts.

The momentous occasion occurred when Cerda came home early and turned on his television. Much to his delight, he discovered that the cable channel TNN shows the classic police drama Miami Vice weeknights at 7:00pm (8:00pm Central). "Dude," says Cerda. "That show is the awesomest show ever made... EVER! Crockett and Tubbs were always kicking ass. They were such bad-asses. Oh, and that theme song, that was awesome. Dum dum dum. Da dum dum dum. Da dum dum dum."

While the nostalgia trip back to a more innocent time when Phil Collins still had hair definitely brought Cerda's excitation levels up, it alone was not enough to cause the phenomenon to occur. After Miami Vice, Cerda changed the channel, only to find that the cable channel USA shows the soon-to-be-classic police drama Nash Bridges weeknights at 8:00pm (7:00pm Central). That's when he put two and two together and came up with 22.

"Dude, I realized that was, like, back-to-back Don Johnson. Two full hours of him in stylish clothes helping his ethnic partner stop crime in a beautiful city while driving an exquisite car."

Upon this realization, an unknown creamy substance began to discharge from his lower orifices. At first, Cerda was worried that it might've been a sexually transmitted disease, but then he remembered that he hasn't gotten laid in a really long time. I mean, a really long time. Seeing as the discharge seemed pretty harmless, causing nothing but a literal creaming of the shorts, Cerda dismissed it. "Yeah, it wasn't like I had a hot date that night, or some girlfriend who'd notice stains on my underwear."

The next day, Cerda recounted his story to several disgusted and/or uninterested parties, although Photo Editor Christopher L. Davis was later heard to remark, "Our Literary Editor did something literally? Dude, that's like irony or something."